Talk Like A Pirate Day.. Tomorrow, Sept 19th

Ye be an insolent sea dog to pass on this here special day..

WARNING: Mature Content, not intended for folks under the legal drink’n age or self-righteous bilge rats. Ye be warned…

‘Been plan’n this here tribute to “Pirates ‘n Rum”, ever since I stumbled on to this here reference in Wikipedia.

Credit for creat’n ‘Talk Like a Pirate Day’ goes to two Rum pots in Albany, Oregon.

Ol’ Chumbucket an’ Cap’n Slappy came up with the idea in 1996. The scalawag Dave Barry (a syndicated humorist) helped it along with a story he did in 2002. If it’s in Print, it has to be true, right? The two scurvy dogs have their own YouTube vids and much, much more. ARRGGG!!!!!

note: i have had a link here for years to the scalwags’ website but it has not been kept up to date. i’ve replaced it with the wikipedia page for the time bein’ – one day they may be back to entertain ye…

There be several points to this here post..
Most of em’s about drink’n Rum. ARRG!

This be a day for carrousin’ and general mischief.

If ye go out to celebrate, hoist a glass to “Poseidon and all the scurvy souls who never returned from the sea” (since it be Sunday and all). A shot o’ RUM or something with Rum in it, would be most abid’n. Me favorite is a Rum ‘n Diet Coke, or as I calls it, a Borinquen Libre with a squeeze of Puerto Rican lemon juice instead of lime. We got ’em growin’ in the yarrd.. they taste like a lemon/lime cross. Next best would be Planter’s Punch or a Maitai.. Rum ‘n Pineapple arre good together.

Heaven forbid, a frilly frou-frou Daiquiri or Pina Colada for all ye sweet sea wenches.
Mojitos are a lot of work, but downright tasty too. A stein o’ warm Ale, if all else fails or a cold Medalla if ye got one.

RUM, the Driving Force Behind All Things Pirate

I has been work’n on this here idea for some time… I wanted to taste-test some of the Rums of the Caribbean and present the results on me Blog.

Avast, the local selection be rather meager. I had more Rum choices when I dropped anchor in Alaska.

Don Q, Bacardi and Captain Morgan are the most popular for obvious reasons. So far, Walmart has the best selection I’ve found, but that ain’t say’n much. Fortunately, their stock includes a few Rums from elsewhere. I’m still look’n for more.

The Rums of Puerto Rico Web site lists only 5 Puerto Rican brands. Its a fancy shmancy site sponsored by the 5. If I stumble onto any locally produced labels, I’ll let ye know. Back in the old days, there were many private label PR Rums. Not so much anymore.

When it comes to RUM, the Ministry of Rum site lists Rums from all over the world. I learned things about Puerto Rican Rum, I had not seen elsewhere. They sponsor formal Rum tastings throughout the year.

note: i have had a link here for years to the ministry of rum website but it has not been kept up to date. it is still online but me security suggests you do the search…

They state that there are only 3 major distillers left in Puerto Rico;
Bacardi, Castillo and Serralles.

Wikipedia sez that the Puerto Rico Sugar Company set up a new distillery in Mayaguez in 2009 (on the west end of the island). Production is limited to 100 bottles a day. Labeled as ‘Pitorro’, it’s a designer Rum meant to mimic the home made Pitorro, moonshine of the past. I have yet to find this one, though I did score a T-shirt with the logo on it. The illicit Pitorro you see today is always available dur’n the Christmas season.

The Good, the Bad and the Tasty

(Sea Chanty, sing along: “Dirty Deeds, Done Dirt Cheap”)

I ran two ‘tests’ back to back. A short shot ‘neat’ and a short Rum and Diet Coke with tropical lemon juice. Lemon juice ye say? GOYA brands sells tropical lemon juice in a nice big green bottle. The image on the label resembles limes, not lemons. It looks and tastes just like the PR lemons we have. Thin skinned and very pale green on the inside (even after they turn yellow and fall off the tree). I usually pick’m while they’re still a little green. I calls it ‘Jungle Juice’.

I also want to make it crystal clear, I’m not a Rum connoisseur. This was done for fun, to satisfy my own curiosity. Nor was I blindfolded for the ‘sipping’.

I sampled 12 bottles of Rum… 10 were from Puerto Rico, the other 2 were from the Dominican Republic. What’s more, 4 were Añejo which puts them in a higher class. Añejo is aged longer, making for a smoother premium Rum. Tasting proved that.

THE GOOD: This included Bacardi Gold, Ron Llave Supremo, Ron Cañita (Alambique) and Ron del Barrilito. These are all popular local labels. The Llave Supremo was a pale amber Rum with a little after-bite, but no after-taste. Very palatable. Cañita is a clear Rum. Smooth, with no after-bite or after-taste. Perfect for any purpose. And del Barrilito, another pale amber Rum. Smooth, with very little after-bite and a mild, but pleasant after-taste. It would be real good in a Borinquen Libre or any tropical mixed drink. I liked all 4, but the Bacardi Gold was the best of this group. Perfect for any mixed drink (IMO).

THE BAD: The cheapest Rums were also the harshest going down. Granado and both Castillos take this prize. They often sell for less than $6 bucks a bottle. Of the 3, Castillo Silver had the least objectionable after-taste. It would be OK for punch or pineapple based drinks. In the past, I’ve used it in Rum ‘n Cokes, but I always preferred Ronrico Gold. Bacardi was out of my budget unless it was on sale. Ye don’t get what ye don’t pay for, Arrg!

And THE TASTY: These included both Dominican Republic Añejo Rums, Bacardi Select, Don Q Añejo and Reserva Añejo. All of these Rums are perfect neat or used in Rum ‘n Cokes. As to other mixed drinks, that would be your call. The Reserva Añejo came in a designer bottle with a label declaring it- “World’s Finest Rum”. It was very smooth with a slight caramel after-taste.

Unfortunately, the cork promptly broke off the wooden top,
plus the bottle was hard to pour from, without dribbl’n.

I guess they thought you would buy it and put it away for a rainy day. I drank mine!

Everybody is familiar with Bacardi and for good reason. They are the world standard of which all other rums are judged by.

Even their Select Rum can compete with others’ Añejo.

Bacardi Select was the darkest of the 12, but smoother
than most. The after-taste was flavorful, but clean.

I did not taste-test Bacardi’s Añejo or 8 Year Old Rums as they are outside my budget. I’m sure they are superior Rums. The Two DR Añejo Rums, Ron Brugal and Ron Barcelo were exceptional. Very clean, very smooth. The Brugal was a dark amber with a slight caramel after-taste. I really liked it. Every bit as good as any I tasted. The Barcelo was a pale amber, with a very light after-taste. Almost sweet. One of my personal favorites. What’s more, it can often be had for well under $11 bucks. Not bad, not bad at all.

The best tasting Rum of the bunch was Don Q Añejo. Perfect for sipping neat, over the Rocks or in a Rum ‘n Coke. It’s a little on the pricy side, but well worth it. I rate it number one! ARRG!

The Dog’s Disclaimer: This was for all ye responsible scalawags.
The rest of ye, should be ashamed of ye unworthy selves. A real Pirate knows thar be consequences for his/her exploits, good, bad or otherwise. Do stupid stuff and it will eventually catch up to ye. So Sez the Dog, Arrg!

SCURVY RUM FACT: All Rums commercially produced in Puerto Rico are aged a minimum one year. Whether they say it on the label or not. It’s the law!

FACEBOOK ‘Pirate Jabber’

Did ye know that ye can set your Facebook page to render all text in Pirate Speak? ARRG! Scroll to the bottom of any page.. next to the Facebook copyright tag is where you set your language preferences. Click it and a window with options pops up. Under English, thar be 4 choices and one of ’em be for “English (pirate)”. Since I fancy me self a Pirate, I leaves it set to that all the time. It can be a little confus’n, but ye can always scroll to the bottom of a page and change it back. ARRG!

Shiver Me Timbers, a Book for Pirates!

I received this as a gift and was honorably impressed (thanx tons, Sally). The hard bound “Pirates Most Wanted” by John Matthews is a lavishly illustrated piece of work. Cover Quote: “Thirteen of the Most Bloodthirsty Pirates Ever to Sail the High Seas”. More of an overview than a detailed account’n o’ their exploits. All the usual suspects are here. Henry Morgan, Edward Teach and Bartholomew Roberts to name just a few.

To its discredit, it is missing Puerto Rico’s most notorious pirate, Roberto Cofresí of Cabo Rojo. On March 29th, 1825, he and his men were executed by firing squad in what’s now Old San Juan. Roberto is ‘six-feet-under’, on the rise above the old cemetary outside El Moro Fort.

Rest his soul, I’ve tromped across that field meself!

The book is targeted at 9 year olds, anyone who dreams of a ‘Pirates Life’ and old fools like me who want to be 9 again. After having worked in commercial printing for 30 years, I can say that this is an outstanding piece of reproduction and creative illustration. If ye be a graphic designer, this would make a great reference piece for the period. I wish I had laid scope on this before I created me Web site. Only 14 leaves/28 pages with fold out center spread, but beautifully done. ARRG!

Pirate Jokes Galore: Avast, Ye Sea Dog!

A beautifully done site featuring lots o’ pirate humor. Lots o’ links and jokes to check out. To quote Capt’n Karikas “Thar’s wind in me sails and bad puns ahead!”. He even has an Android app for that.

I’ll leave ye be with this here glint o’ treasure.

They’ll be shoot’n a 4th “Pirates of the Caribbean (On Stranger Tides)” here in Puerto Rico, real soon. Corona’s Coming Attractions has all the details. Disney must have paid Johnny Depp, a boat load of gold doubloons to come back a 4th time. Currently set for release on May 20th, 2011.
Here’s to Jack Sparrow… thee swarthy devil he be!

It All be True or Strike me Dead Where I Stands, Arrg!
Roberto, the Scurvy Dog o’ Puerto Rico